Friday, March 15, 2013

One teeny step

When I woke up this morning, I told myself that I would spend a significant amount of time "writing".  No, not blog writing because that really doesn't count.  The words just sort of tumble out of my brain in a jumbled free-flowing mess in the blog.  I don't have to think so much about what I put here.  It's a steady stream of thought.  I meant that I was going to sit down and focus on writing my novel.  I'm actually going to call it a novel.  I think I need to call it a novel because I have to see it as this thing that needs to be so many pages/words long.  A book can be any length.  A children's book is like 6 pages so that's not a very lofty goal to set for myself.  

I got to have a wonderful visit from one of my most favorite people in the world today, Miss Monica Baker.  She brought me this kick ass smoothie that I cannot wait to keep making for myself as well.  It was awesome.  I am glad she brought two servings because I have more for tomorrow!! Yay.  Anyway, it was wonderful to sit and talk with her.  I miss working with her and being able to work out with her and have our lil vent sessions about whatever we want to talk about.  I am going to have to have more of her in my life because she makes me feel happy.  Monica, if you see this, we have to hang out more!! I will do my damndest to make that happen too.  I need to see your lil boys grow up and not just in pictures. 

After she left, to go workout without me, (sniffle) I had some smoothie and played around on my iPad.  Then, I went to get zapped for the last day this week (thank god).  I am not feeling like a superhero yet.  I mean, they shoot me with what feels like gamma rays every day, I would think I would start to have some sort of super power by now.  Nope, still plain ol' me.  

I sat down on the couch when I got home.  (It kicked my butt today, it's all I really feel I can do at the moment).  I pulled the laptop onto my lap (go figure) and opened the Word document I had set up yesterday for this very reason.  It's labeled "Alice Redux" because my story takes some snippets and inspiration from Alice In Wonderland.  But, that's really all you get to know.  Anyway, I'm pretty pleased with myself.  I wrote 4,511 words in just under two hours.  I know that seems slow, but ... 9 pages!  Nine pages, which I made into the first chapter (for now, I alway edit and add more).  I'm pretty stoked that I finally shoved this story off the ground.  I keep thinking about it, getting inspired for scenes of the tale here and there but never really getting down to it.  Well, now I did.  I have a one chapter start, a nine page start, a 4511 word start! 

I am sure there are authors out there who pound out more than 9 pages in a sitting.  I am taking baby steps.  I really want to write something I can send in.  I really want to write something I can be proud of.  I really would love to even just have one novel published.  It would be an excellent side job, wouldn't it?  I could use a little extra fundage to pay off the bills that will no doubt add up from being on my ass!! 

It does make me feel good that I started.  All it takes is a start.  I may work on it some more later.  I'll keep you all informed. 

Now, today's zapping seems to have zonked me out.  It literally zapped all my energy.  I physically felt it leave me as I was driving home from radiation.  LIke, someone opened the chute and it all fell out.  Drained, dizzy, lightheaded and ready to be back on my couch in my sweats.  The drained/sore throat is definitely from my radiation.  The lightheadedness is the usual crap from my other ailment.  I still cough and I have these nasty pains in the bottom area of my lungs.  I'm not sure if it is from how I'm sitting on the couch (because it's not the best posture) or something else.  I also woke up last night in agony.  My knees were KILLING me as if I had been walking or squatting all day.  My left lower back was also screaming at me.  It was horrible.  I cannot figure it out.  Today my ankles hurt pretty bad and feel a little puffy.  It sucks that I have to keep track of these things.  I need to keep an eye out for things progressing and getting worse with the Wegener's/GPA.  I have done enough research to know what to expect from my radiation side effects so I am trying to keep a record of the non-radiation issues for my doctors. 

Also, if someone can remind me ... I need to call Stanford and UCSF to see what it would take to see their vasculitis specialists.  I was supposed to today, but then I got soooo involved in writing and mentally feeling happy that I let the crappy stuff slip to the side. 

I remember saying to Monica earlier that some days when I feel OK I feel bad for being off work but then, by nighttime, I'm in bad shape.  Truer words couldn't have been spoken.  Because in just a few short hours after seeing Monica I am the complete opposite of what I was when I saw her.  My teeth even hurt a little now ... They did tell me that things would ramp up and get worse in the second week.  It's the end of the first and I am starting to feel a little more than I did before.  

Well, that was my day so far.  I don't think there will be anything else to report as I am sure my night will consist of sitting in front of the tube, iphone or iPad, wasting brain cells because why not ... my brain still works! 

Thank you for tuning into today's episode of my ongoing saga!! 

1 comment:

  1. Yay! I'm so glad to hear you got a start on your novel. I'm always so awe inspired by creative writers.
    Sorry you're feeling crappier though. As always, lots of hugs