Monday, April 8, 2013

Cross your fingers

I feel somewhat normal at the moment.  A little tired and weak but not dizzy or nauseous.  I haven't coughed yet today.  I had the same start to my day yesterday and it ended badly.  But, I am hoping this is the start of things looking up.  I have 6 treatments left.  This week and Monday and I am done.  Then, I need to shake off the side effects from the radiation and hope that I feel better than I have.  I see my oncologist for follow up on April 24th.  He will then tell me when I can go back to work. 

I am hoping to go back April 29th, that's the following Monday.  I won't push him to let me back on April 25th.  That's super short notice for people working for me that would be cancelled.  Of course, the following Monday might be super short notice too. I don't know.  I'll let work decide if I need to give them a bit more notice.  I can't tell them til I see the doctor so ... it's kind of out of my hands!  

I would really welcome back my regular routine. It would definitely lift my spirits to feel normal again.  As much as I love being home at night, I'll be happy to be on some kind of routine that gets me moving and out of the house.  When I do get released to go back to work, I'll have to start gradually staying up later so that when I go back to work I'm not ready for bed at 9.  If Dan would stop working down in the city I would not be going to be at 9!   Oh who am I kidding?!  I was asleep on the couch at 8:40 last night.  I was really feeling awful though so that didn't help keep me awake.  

I have errands to run today surrounding my treatment.  The bank, FedEx, and then treatment.  It's not much but I keep having to remind myself so I watch the clock to leave earlier than usual.  If I try to do it afterwards, that's when I usually lose my spark and fade quickly.  I try to do stuff before they zap me.  Everything is on the way.  The bank is across the street and FedEx is on RPX.  Easy as pie. 

Crap, I haven't drank any water today.  I was doing something, and didn't even finish my smoothie.  I drank only about half before I got busy paying bills and such.  I swear sometimes I think I have ADD.  I get distracted so easily and ten forget what I was supposed to be doing.  haha Is it because I'm getting old? No.  I've done this my whole life!  When I would clean my room, I'd find something and then ... that was it.  I wouldn't finish. That little distraction would undoubtedly lead to some other distraction and I'm no longer in my room at all!! 

Well, I need to get my butt into the shower so I better wrap this up before I am further distracted! Thanks for listening to my ramblings.  Or is it reading my ramblings?  I don't know what the blog protocol is for that sentence.  I am sure it'll be pointed out to me.    Who knew I was supposed to write my blog a certain way?  It's mine! Anyway ... look, I'm already distracted from getting off the computer. 

So ... like the title says, cross your fingers that this feeling normal feeling stays.  I want my life back.  Pretty please!! 

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