Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Overwhelmed, much?

I haven't really had a moment to really relish in the completion of treatment.  I can't even say "Yay, I'm cancer free" because going the radiation route, I never really felt like I could at all be compared to those going through chemotherapy.  I almost felt like I shouldn't say I had cancer because there's cancer and then there's CANCER.  I felt like I got it SUPER easy.  Yes, I whined and bitched and moaned (and still am because trust me, the symptoms are not gone) but, I didn't have it THAT bad.  I have my hair, I didn't vomit and get sick everyday.  At no point during this treatment was my health in any jeopardy.  

Yes, I don't feel better.  Yes, there's still something wrong with me that the doctors haven't figured out.   Once the side effects of this radiation is completely gone, I'll know which ones to go back to the doctors with.  I'm still exhausted and fatigued.  My neck hurts and is sunburnt and tender.  My saliva is all clumpy and thick in the back of my throat, my tastebuds have gone wonky, and I have the nastiest taste in my mouth.  I feel horrifically sick at times (not radiation) and sometimes, for like an hour I feel normal! 

But, with the house junk, I haven't had a chance to celebrate being done with radiation.  It's been like standing on top of a bullet train.  It started moving and hasn't stopped and is going SO fast! We didn't expect to find a house on our first day out house hunting.  We didn't expect them to accept our offer.  We didn't expect everything to fall together.  Yes, I've had to jump through SO many hurdles with paperwork and running back and forth to FedEx Kinko's, faxing and copying and scanning.  There's been inspections and negotiations, more faxing and scanning, digging up paperwork ... *sigh*  

Then, there's the exciting news ... yet daunting news at the same time.  We are on track to have keys in hand to that house on May 1st.  That is a week from tomorrow.  We are planning to move that weekend.  We started to pack and got some of the office packed.  That's it.  We didn't want to get too crazy and pack and then have something fall through.  But now, it's on track to close.  It's time to start packing stuff.  

I don't even know where to start.  I mean, I do.  I've been pricing getting some boxes, packing tape and tissue from U-Haul. It wouldn't be so expensive to go get some boxes and such.  I am going to pack the kitchen, clean out the refrigerator, throw out expired spices, etc.  That's my first project in the packing mess.  The bedroom is easy, toss the drawers in the truck (full), toss the stuff on the hangers in the back of the 4runner and go. The bed and dresser will ride in the moving van.  See?  Easy.  It's all the crap that's in cabinets, on shelves, etc.  

Just gotta get started on it.  Maybe tomorrow after my doctor's appointment I'll pick up a handful of large boxes, some bubble wrap and get the cabinets emptied in the kitchen.  Not sure where I'll put the boxes when I'm done!! 

Also, I have to vent ... and this is going to make me sound like a dirty person.  I'm NOT a dirty person.  This is why this distresses me so much.  I'll start by saying this Frontline Plus doesn't work.  I used it, thought maybe it wasn't working but tried again another month.  Then, I was certain it wasn't working because all the animals were scratching.  I switched to Advantage at the beginning of the month on Loki.  Yet, he was still itchy. I got him a dose of Capstar which kills all adult fleas.  However, if there were fleas in the carpet or on the cats he could get them again.  Well, I'm still finding them.  I vacuumed everywhere today, changed the litter box, stripped the bed, vacuumed the cat trees and Loki's blanket.  I dosed the cats with their Advantage (I hadn't bought theirs til I knew it would work).  I have some boxes already pilingup so this vacuuming wasn't as thorough as it could be.  I feel itchy everywhere after finding fleas on the dog last night.  

And that's not all ... this part kept me up most of the night even after getting in bed.   Last night, while watching TV, I felt something on my leg.  I looked down, saw a spot and swiped at it.  When the thing landed on the rug I turned on the flashlight on the iPhone and shone it on it.  UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A TICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Loki and I went and walked on the Laguna De Santa Rosa trail last Thursday.  He went off trail at one point and I drug him back, I checked him over for ticks and hadn't felt any. However, this Tick looked like it hadn't fed on anything.  I am thinking the critter had been crawling around in his thick fur and never attached itself.  If it had it would have died because of his flea/tick treatment.  I put the damn thing inside a ziploc bag, inside another ziploc bag and then inside another one and made sure they were all sealed.  It was almost midnight so I couldn't set it on fire ... trust me I would have.  I still feel like my skin is crawling.  

I am so happy the new house has 90% wood floors.  Only the bedrooms are carpeted!!! It's all new inside so I can keep it clean from the beginning instead of battling against an old, moldy house like I live in now.  

Oh I feel so gross.  I hope all this work today helps.  With all the moving and boxes I feel like I can't get the place as clean as I want.  

Yes, if you can't figure it out.  I am overwhelmed by the move, I am overwhelmed by bugs in my house.  I am overwhelmed!!!!!! 

Am I allowed to have a drink yet??  I could sure use one. 

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