Awhile ago, gosh ... It's been years, I was in this hobby shop with my ex husband. He was looking at RC car accessories and I wandered off to the plush toys and fantasy items. There was something there that spoke to me. A story spun it's web in my mind and I've carried that idea with me for years. I've seen this same item more recently and the story was still there. Why have I never sat down and written it?
Because I'm scared. I'm highly critical of books. I like good books so I'm hesitant because how could someone like me be able to write something that would be good enough to publish?
I'm a realist when it comes to the ways of the world. The writing being sent in to publishing houses is probably SO good and SO established. Why would someone take a look at something from a no name person like myself?
This is me being hard on myself. I am hard on myself. I'm harder than anyone else possibly could be! It's not necessarily a good thing. A little criticism is OK but I take it too far.
Speaking of which, I started a new program today. I ordered a month of ore cooked, flash frozen food that is 88% gluten free and only meat and veggies. I am to eat only this and some nuts and a teeny bit of cheese. I need to walk daily, drink lots of water and hopefully start to get rid of some of this excess me.
I need to get over my sugar cravings, and getting away from so much bread and gluten. By the end of the month, I should be well into my new lifestyle. The food plan is good for my disease, it will help me actually start to burn fat ... And we ALL know I need to lose weight.
I'm hopeful I can stick with it. I don't want to be in this body anymore. I can't stand the sight of me. This is not the girl I was... And I intend to shed this shell and be that girl again. In more ways than just how I look. I was more optimistic back then. I felt full of hope and had all these dreams.
Let's get her back.
Who knows, maybe a thinner me will also be more confident about sending my writing into a publishing house?
You never know!!